It’s been one of those days; the kind of day where you struggle to keep calm. Where you’re whole body shakes because you cannot cope with the pent up emotions and to top it off, it was hectic on the ward today. Today I asked to be locked out of my room for a little while. I was struggling to keep my head, and apply logic to my situation. Today I wanted to give up. There was that desire to ligature again. I hate that such a temptation is now occupying my mind. I’ve never done it or wanted to do it before coming in here. But I guess with limited resources, it’s just the go to thing.
I’ve lost another ball over the roof and I’ve burned. The burn is quite painful tonight.