138. In the red.

My gas tank is pretty much empty today. I’m running on fumes. Last night I lay in bed staring at the ceiling for 4 hours, before deciding to just get up.  OH was in a thundering snore beside me and it was driving me insane. Every breath he took mocked my inability to sleep.

At 2am I dragged myself and a duvet to our living room sofa.  I made a cup of tea (de-caf) and proceeded to undo all the great work I had done at the gym earlier by scoffing a mars bar, crisps and some sweets.  After 2 episodes of “it’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” I began to feel drowsy.  OH woke me at 5 am with his morning routine and so i dragged myself back to our bed.

By 7.30 I was up again carrying a little toddler into our room.  He lay beside me watching cartoons until 9, but I didn’t sleep.  I was supposed to bring Little man into nursery today but I couldn’t face it.

I need to have a shower and go and pick up meds (I’m sooooo sick of them only giving me 7 days at a time) but I can’t be arsed.

I’m so tired…………….

Loopy x.

 

 

Author: insideloopyshead

On paper I have the perfect life, good career, supportive and loving partner and a beautiful little son. But today I want to die. It’s time to set my thoughts free. Come along with my daily mental adventures and gain insight into warped thinking and it’s hazards and maybe support me along the way.

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