150. Mum guilt!!!!

“Off course his speech is delayed, you abandoned him for months”.  O.k I’m paraphrasing but that’s what it sounded like to me.  I had a chat today with a new Health Visitor and a Nursery Nurse regarding my concerns over Littlemans development or should I say lack off.  It was an upsetting afternoon.

They were both nice but all I can think, is that my issues have led to my Littlemans problems.  I’m the reason his speech is delayed.  I’m the reason he’s been so stressed.  I’m his Mum and yet all I’ve done is damage him.

Advice wise it was the same old story, “Join some groups!”.  I swear every health professional in my life right now is reading from the same script!  Maybe if I hear it enough times, I’ll give in.  The HV did offer to go to one with me though as a “friend” so that I didn’t have to walk in alone, which in fairness might be helpful.

The thoughts that my Littleman would be better off without me, are very intrusive this evening.

Loopy x.

Author: insideloopyshead

On paper I have the perfect life, good career, supportive and loving partner and a beautiful little son. But today I want to die. It’s time to set my thoughts free. Come along with my daily mental adventures and gain insight into warped thinking and it’s hazards and maybe support me along the way.

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