226. Psychology is exhausting.

And I don’t like breaking down in front of little man. That is a flaw in family therapy. I’m not sure I want to persist with this new lady. She’s really kind and comes across as caring and empathetic, but she’s not K. I want K back.

Also by it’s very nature the sessions bring up stuff that inexplicably can floor you. Do I have the strength for this?

Now that work is also fighting for space in my head, I don’t know if I’m coming or going. My moods are still erratic. My self doubts are still huge, and the lack of affection or intimacy in my relationship exasberbates the fact that I’m ugly and un desirable.

I can see an old pattern emerging, and although we’ve tried to male some positive changes I can’t help but feel the swells of hopelessness, loneliness and a career dissatisfaction that ive never felt before. Or atleast I’ve been questioning is this my final job?

Morale at work itself is noticeably low at the minute. To many expectation triclk8ng down from rooms so far removed from what it’s actually like to get bombarded daily by students, not in the lecture halls but in your office or through email. It just never stops , and they can unleash all matters of personal details that we can’t process or adequately.deal with. We can sign post to support services yes, but the waiting lists are horrendous.

I’m very tempted to start a psychology MSc.

Loopy x

Author: insideloopyshead

On paper I have the perfect life, good career, supportive and loving partner and a beautiful little son. But today I want to die. It’s time to set my thoughts free. Come along with my daily mental adventures and gain insight into warped thinking and it’s hazards and maybe support me along the way.

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