396. Afraid off my own child.

I’m afraid of failing him.

I’m afraid of damaging him.

I’m afraid of not loving him.

I’m afraid of my coldness towards him.

I’m afraid of spending time together.

I’m afraid I’m going to break him.

I’m afraid his head will grow like mine, full off demons and self doubts.

I’m afraid I’m no good for him.

I’m afraid off it all, and I want to run away.

What a horrible selfish bitch of a mother I am.

I don’t deserve him, and he certainly deserves better than me.

Loopy x

Author: insideloopyshead

On paper I have the perfect life, good career, supportive and loving partner and a beautiful little son. But today I want to die. It’s time to set my thoughts free. Come along with my daily mental adventures and gain insight into warped thinking and it’s hazards and maybe support me along the way. View all posts by insideloopyshead