401. A burn

I figured out a way and it felt good.  My arm is a mess but it feels good.  Where the hell is the logic in that? I want to scald again.

Lorazepam on tap and more quietiapine.  I believe the term “medical managment” was used Today.

So drug me till I’m stable and then what? Hoist me back to my reality. I’m not fixable. I’m incapable of change and I’m a waste of resources.  Oh and did I mention how much fun level one obs are!!

Fuck sake just do it loopy, you coward.

OH and little man are doing great without me.  I think that’s the way it should be. They’d be happier without me.  I’m a horrible influence on their lives.  I’m a horrible person.

I can’t be good for them. I can’t be what I need to be. I’m sorry. 

Loopy x

Author: insideloopyshead

On paper I have the perfect life, good career, supportive and loving partner and a beautiful little son. But today I want to die. It’s time to set my thoughts free. Come along with my daily mental adventures and gain insight into warped thinking and it’s hazards and maybe support me along the way. View all posts by insideloopyshead