201. Devastated.

Today I had my last home visit from my current CPN. I just about held it together. I desperately wanted to hug her as she left, but had I done so, I would have crumbled and never let her go.

It’s another devastating blow. She’s assured me that her successor is as kind and competent as she is, but I find that hard to believe.

I’m returning to work soon and I feel like I need her. Everything is changing; new psychology refferal, back to work, and now a new CPN. When your mood swings like mine does, it’s hard to cope with changes. It’s tougher still when the person you’re losing, is excellent and irreplaceable.

I’m feeling lost this evening. I’m scared and stressed and not sure if I have the strength to keep going.

I need to take my bike out.

Loopy x

Author: insideloopyshead

On paper I have the perfect life, good career, supportive and loving partner and a beautiful little son. But today I want to die. It’s time to set my thoughts free. Come along with my daily mental adventures and gain insight into warped thinking and it’s hazards and maybe support me along the way.

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